Giving Thanks Challenge ~ (Days #23 ~ 28}

Thanksgiving Challenge ~ Days #23 ~ 27

Topic: Noelle

{If you are new to this challenge, you can catch up on the details here}



The past Thanksgiving week has been extremely busy, yet filled with much joy as we were able to spend time with our family {Day #23}.

~Noelle celebrating Thanksgiving in her outfit, handmade just for her with love by Auntie Em~

Because of all that has transpired since June, we were unsure if we would be able to travel and were also constrained by the health of everyone who would be surrounding us.  Flu shots had to be administered to all, good health had to be maintained, and other various guidelines followed {which is no easy task when you are trying to connect your family from five states}.  We cautiously prepared, keeping in touch with everyone planning to attend and always being ready to stay home and employ Plan B if it became necessary.  However, after a final check-up on Monday and knowing that one of my sisters is a PICU nurse and another family member is a Pediatric Intensivist, we were cleared to go as far as Noelle was concerned.

~We were unable to obtain a picture of the entire group, but we did get all the girls!~

Tuesday was our departure day; and by God's grace, we made it to that point with everyone having met the needed requirements.  We packed {and packed, and packed some more!} and began our drive {no flying for us for a long while yet, due to exposure} to my sister's home in Kentucky.  Along the way, we had the wonderful blessing of stopping at my grandparents home and capturing a five generation photograph {Day #24}, as my great grandmother was visiting them for the holiday. 

~Five Generations~

What a precious moment this was, and I am so grateful to have been able to spend time with my great grandma and snap these photos that we will cherish forever.  On Wednesday, we continued our drive to Kentucky; and while a little tired of the car seat at times, Noelle did extremely well on her first road trip.  Upon arrival, we were greeted with smiles of joy from loved ones who have long prayed and anticipated the moment of meeting our little miracle; and any fears of how the situation might be handled through the week were immediately quelled as everyone gave space and utilized the hand soap and hand sanitizer that were readily available throughout the house.  One of my favorite aspects of this trip was that Noelle was able to meet her sweet cousin {Day #25} on this trip.  Although she was supposed to be five weeks older and the first grandchild, Ellie is two months younger and now the second grandchild on our side of the family.  However, you would never know it to see the two of them together!

~Noelle & Ellie, standing side by side~

As we did a little candid photo shoot with them before leaving {after Purelling Ellie from head to toe...literally!}, we were certain that we could see a budding friendship destined to last for the rest of their lives {well, perhaps it was wishful thinking, but we will assume that to be true for now!}.

It was so enjoyable to spend the Thanksgiving holiday with our family, especially as we rejoiced in the little miracle we held in our arms.  We traveled home with full and thankful hearts, refreshed with the sweet fellowship we had shared throughout the week.  As we unpacked and settled back into our routine, I was reminded of how grateful I am for the layout of our apartment {Day #26}.  This may seem silly; but in our situation, it has significance.  While at my sister's, we were able to borrow Ellie's video monitor while Noelle took naps upstairs in the bedroom.  Had we not had that device, I would have been sitting in the hallway through all of her naps, making sure her oxygen saturation stayed level since the pulse oximeter alarm could not be heard downstairs.  However, at home, we have one level, and Noelle's cradle and monitors sit directly inside our bedroom and can be seen all the way down the hallway.  I can hear her and her alarms throughout the apartment, and I realized not only how convenient this has become for us, but also how comforting it is to know that she is just that close all through the day.  She is continuing to progress well, and although she is still gaining weight slowly {weighing 10 lbs. / 13 oz. today} and is somewhat behind in her gross motor skills, she is still moving forward, and we are enjoying every moment.  She is beginning to sit up {Day #27} with some support, and I think she may be doing it completely on her own by her birthday!

~Practicing Sitting Up~

Milestones such as this mean so much to us, as each one represents yet another aspect of God's grace in her growth and health.  Finally, as I perused pictures today for this post, I was reminded of yet another special blessing for which I am thankful: Noelle's eyesight {Day #28}.  Many of you remember that she received eye surgery for ROP in February, but what I have not mentioned on the blog {due to the events of June that followed shortly after her last eye appointment} is that although her last exam still showed positive results as far as the ROP was concerned, the opthamologist believed that she is going nearsighted and would need glasses by the time she is one year old.  Honestly, glasses are the least of our concern, since we are just grateful that she can see at all!  This diagnosis has yet to be confirmed until our appointment on December 10th; but after watching her closely through the last several months, I am not certain this will be the case.  She seems to be able to see across the room without difficulty, and this was confirmed by the following photo.  As her Uncle Nathan held her in one part of the kitchen during our Thanksgiving holiday, Noelle caught a glimpse of her daddy on the other side of the room, and her response was captured in this picture.  Need I say more?  To say we are grateful seems hardly enough...

~Smiling at Daddy across the room~

Giving Thanks Challenge ~ {Days #18~22}

Thanksgiving Challenge ~ Day #18~22

Topic: Noelle

I have much catching up to do and a full heart as we wish you a wonderul Thanksgiving Day, continuing this season of thanks to God for all He has done.

{If you are new to this challenge, you can catch up on the details here, and please feel free to join along at any time...}


Day #18: Noelle's Cry

A dear friend from college, Amber Olson, recently sent me a poem she wrote with Noelle's cry as the subject.  It brought tears to my eyes as it so poetically captured our feelings on this precious sound, especially during those early months.  This poem says it all {thank you so much, Amber, for this beautiful piece}:

The Cry

Most parents do their utmost

To prevent a child's cry.

We shush and rock and bounce them,

Softly sing a lullabye.

We ache when they are hurting,

And they can not tell us why.

But there was a day a year ago,

When parents strained their ears.

They longed to hear the noise

That often signals baby tears.

And you could hear a pin drop,

As they tried to quell their fears.

For they'd been given awful news

That a mommy's heart had rent,

And the shadows under daddy's eyes,

Proved nights in prayer he'd spent,

And they hoped just to kiss their baby,

Before she off to heaven went.

But a tiny little fighter,

Would make all predictions lie,

And the gracious God of heaven,

Would great miracles supply,

And there were tears - but tears of gladness

When they heard their baby cry.

Amber Olson

November 16, 2012

Day #19: Health Care

One year ago at this time, we were in the process of switching all of our prenatal care over to our specialist.  Up until that time, we had continued to be seen by my regular OB/GYN doctor along with my specialist, since the OB doctor followed my care while the specialist closely monitored Noelle.  It was complicated and meant that I was being seen by one of them every single week; but at the time, we expected to deliver Noelle as a stillborn baby and did not see any reason to find another care provider in the midst of everything we were facing.  The week before Thanksgiving brought the first glimmer of hope we had ever been given; and although we still had no idea what was in store, we cautiously clung to hope and began to consider our options if Noelle happened to be born living.  Still, we did not immediately think to investigate NICU facilities or doctors since this was an entirely new world to us, and we still had no idea what was ahead.  However, all of that began to change when I went in for a check-upwith my regular OB doctor only a couple of days before Thanksgiving.  I had planned to fly and be with family over the holiday, as long as Noelle's heartbeat was still strong, and was excited to hear that fast, strong little sound as soon as the doppler touched my tummy.  But the appointment took a very negative turn as soon as the doctor entered.  She had reviewed our previous week's ultrasound {the one with the first good news we had ever heard} and had come back with a completely different perspective; and although she did not use the term "abortion" {we had absolutely forbidden the mention of it since before there were "issues"} she continually stressed to us that our baby would never be "normal" and she very obviously had a different view on how she would handle our situation. Tom and I left that day, feeling as if every hope we had received the week prior had just been thrown on to the ground and stomped into oblivion.  It was terrible.  I was extremely upset, especially since this doctor would be in the delivery room with us; and if Noelle did happen to survive through the birth, it made us wonder what she would or would not do regarding her care.  We never wanted extreme measures to be taken, but we also wanted everything reasonably possible to be done, if she had a fighting chance.  It still took another twenty-four hours for us pray, talk and work through the situation, seek counsel, and speak with our specialist and genetic counselor; but the final result was that we switchedour entire care over to our specialists, which meant changing clinics/hospital from Greensboro to Winston Salem.  Little did we know that God was weaving His goodand perfect plan through that appointment that seemed so absolutely terrible.  Within two weeks, Noelle would be born, with the exact doctors in the exact facility with the most perfect NICU possible for us and our situation.  I would never choose to repeat that day over again, but I am incredibly grateful to God for using that situation to push us to make the choices necessary in our health care.  He truly put us in the perfect place, in His perfect time.

Day #20: Buckley Reports

When we first met Bob Buckley and his photographer, Eric Sander, we were apprehensive and very leery of allowing them to follow our story. At the time, we had been told that Noelle would not survive, and they wanted to create a story surrounding the Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep foundation, which provides bereavement photography for families who lose their precious babies.  After a conversation over lunch with many questions, much prayer, discussion, and thought, we finally agreed to proceed with their following our story.  Our desire was to make other families aware of this option for grieving families as well as to document what we thought would be the last few weeks we would have with Noelle.  To our surprise and joy, the story has developed into much more than any of us every imagined, and on November 20th, FOX 8 News ran the fifth segment of this story.  This particular clip focused on Noelle's upcoming first birthday; and it has been enjoyable to reflect on this past year, not only with Noelle but also with Bob Buckley, Eric, and Ferlon {his most recent photographer} as we had the opportunity to spend much time with them and get to know them through this process.  They have done a wonderful job with each part of the story, and we have been truly grateful for their hard work and the unforgettable memories they have preserved on film for us.  They have faithfully endeavored to portray what is true, especially as we have shared our faith; and we have thoroughly enjoyed working with them.  If you missed the story on Tuesday night, you can always watch it again here.  Thank you, Bob, Eric, Ferlon, and the FOX 8 News team for all you have done for us through this past year! 

 

Day #21: Sweet Smile

The pictures say it all...

Day #22: Noelle on Thanksgiving Day

I am overwhelmed today as I remember one year ago and all that we were contemplating at the time.  Noelle was making her tiny presence known throughout each day; and I was treasuring each kick as the very last.  We spent time with family, doing all of our normal traditions; but try as we might, nothing was quite the same.  A weight was on our hearts and minds, and I could not help but wonder if the subsequent holiday seasons through the years would be reminders of great sorrow or great joy.  We are thankful every day for this precious miracle, but this Thanksgiving and Christmas season are especially dear to our hearts, considering all that we experienced during this time last year.  As I look at my baby girl today and kiss her sweet cheeks, smile into her eyes, and cuddle her oh so close, I breathe yet another prayer of humble thanks to God for all that He has done.  To say that we are truly blessed hardly seems to be adequate, but we are indeed blessed beyond measure.  Thank you, God.

Giving Thanks Challenge ~ {Day #13}

Thanksgiving Challenge ~ Day #13

Topic: Noelle
Title: This Baby's Laugh

{If you are new to this challenge~which is not your typical Thanksgiving challenge, you can catch up on the details here, and please feel free to join along at any time...}

Tonight, the video says it all {I apologize for the poor quality, but I was capturing this moment on my own while making her laugh at the same time}.  Enjoy!!!

***There are only 3 days left to submit your entry for the book project for Noelle's birthday.  You can read about the project and the deadline by clicking here .  We are putting the book together and enjoying the submissions we have already received but would love to hear from you, if you are willing to participate.  Thank you so much for helping us make Noelle's first birthday a special time of remembrance!!***

Giving Thanks Challenge ~ {Days #10-12}

Thanksgiving Challenge ~ Days #10-12

Topic: Noelle
Title: Great Grandparents, Our Church Body, & Noelle's Medical Team

{If you are new to this challenge~which is not your typical Thanksgiving challenge, you can catch up on the details here, and please feel free to join along at any time...}

I am woefully behind on posting yesterday and today, and with an extremely busy week being already underway, I have decided to catch up the posts on which I am behind, as well as get ahead by one post and include tomorrow's thankfulness challenge.  Unfortunately, this may happen a few times over the next couple of weeks, due to our schedule; but my heart and mind are still dwelling on this challenge, even if I do not have the time to write it out each day.  Thank you to all who have commented and participated along the way.  You have been a blessing to me!

Day #10: Great Grandparents

~Four Generations (Noelle: 4 months old)~

Many children are blessed to have loving grandparents, but few are privileged to meet their great grandparents.  I was one of those few, being the daughter of very young parents and grandparents. The memories I have of my great grandparents are not many, but they are precious to me; and I am thankful for the heritage they have left in my family.  I still have one great grandma living who will {the Lord willing} be visiting and meeting Noelle next week; and we are eagerly anticipating the opportunity to spend time with her and capture a five generation picture {which I am sure to cherish forever}.  This will be possible since my mom now resides here, and her parents {my grandparents / Noelle's great grandparents} live within a two hour distance; so we are blessed to see them fairly often.  I do not know how much time the Lord has given to us with them, but I am grateful for the opportunity that Noelle has to grow up near them and know them.  They are incredibly special people in our lives; and every time we visit, we envision Noelle one day walking hand in hand with them through the vegetable and fruit gardens, sneaking a bite of a plump, red strawberry or a juicy blueberry, gently tossing feed to organically raised chickens, or swinging on the porch in the summer breeze.  G-Pa and Gigi are very much loved, and we thank God for the opportunity to live so close and spend time with them!

~The Boyers: One of many, always ready to answer our call~

Day #11: Our Church Body
Throughout the course of the first several months after Noelle was born, we were often asked if we had family in the local area, causing smiles to cross our faces.  "Yes and No" was always the reply, followed by a short explanation of the fact that we did not have blood-related relatives in the immediate area; however, we did have our church family, and they were supporting us in ways we had never even imagined.  While one friend organized freezer meals, another picked up lunch and brought it to us at the NICU.  Others "kidnapped" us for an hour to escape the hospital and grab a bite to eat, and still more provided gift cards for gas, food, and other needs we had not even stopped to consider.  This and so much more was done for us; but beyond the physical needs for which they cared, the spiritual needs were met as well while they earnestly prayed, visited, sent notes and cards, and encouraged us in every way possible during our journey.  Of course there were many who did some of these things from long distance as well, but there is something special about having that connection with someone nearby, someone who will pick up the phone at any hour of the day or night and drop everything they are doing to get on their knees and pray or come and sit with you at the hospital as you wait for your child to go through surgery....again.  Our blessing was that this "someone" was not just one single person.  We had and still have an entire list of these "someones" who have made themselves available to us for absolutely anything we might need and more.  Anything I could say here would never be adequate enough to thank our church body for all that they have done and continue to do for our family.  We are blessed beyond measure to belong to a body that truly endeavors to practice Christ-likeness to others in a very tangible manner.  Thank you, Twin City Bible Church!  We love you and thank God for you all!!!


Day #12: Noelle's Medical Team
As we embark upon a week full of appointments {six, just for Noelle alone...}, I can sometimes become overwhelmed.  Planning and coordinating efforts for this amount of appointments takes some time and preparation, and it is easy for me to choose the wrong perspective and begin complaining.  However, when I step back and evaluate things honestly, I can be nothing but thankful for these appointments and the doctors who care for Noelle, many though they may be.  The plethora of medical team members has been incredibly beneficial to us through these months since our discharge form the NICU; and the combined effort of them all has helped bring Noelle to the point she is today.  I truly like every single one of her doctors and am so pleased with their care and the time they take with Noelle and with us as parents, answering any question we might have.  So although this week will be tiring, I can be only thankful that each one of these people have helped make it possible for Noelle to live at home with us; and all the appointments in the world could not overshadow the thankfulness in my heart for that.  {P.S.  We hope to report some good progress in Noelle's health by the end of this week!}

If you are local and would like to help a relief project for New Jersey this week, please check out this page and do what you can to assist this effort.  

***Do not forget there is less than one week left to submit your entry for the book project for Noelle's birthday.  You can read about the project and the deadline by clicking here .  We are enjoying the submissions we have already received but would love to hear from you, if you are willing to participate.  Thank you so much for helping us make Noelle's first birthday a special time of remembrance!!***

Eleven Months Old / Giving Thanks Challenge ~ {Day #8}

Thanksgiving Challenge ~ Day #8

Topic: Noelle
Title: Eleven Months Old

{If you are new to this challenge~which is not your typical Thanksgiving challenge, you can catch up on the details here, and please feel free to join along at any time...}

~Really, Mom?~

I can hardly believe that I just wrote the title, "Eleven Months Old."  Where has the time gone?  There have been so many days through these months that I have not dared to think beyond the next hour or the next day, let alone dream about reaching her first birthday; and yet, here we are celebrating eleven precious months with our little girl and entering the home stretch to her one year birthday.  I am overwhelmingly amazed at God's goodness to us and thank Him for each precious moment we have been given with this little girl.  She weighed 10 lbs. / 10 oz. today and continues to fight and grow, tiny though she still may be.  Happy Eleven Month Birthday, Noelle!!  We love you!!!

{Although she is still on oxygen 24/7, she is doing well enough for us to remove the cannula for short moments of time, such as snapping pictures. }

If you are local and would like to help a relief project for New Jersey this week, please check out this page and do what you can to assist this effort.  

***Do not forget there is only one week left to submit your entry for the book project for Noelle's birthday.  You can read about the project and the deadline by clicking here .  We are enjoying the submissions we have already received but would love to hear from you, if you are willing to participate.  Thank you so much for helping us make Noelle's first birthday a special time of remembrance!!***

Giving Thanks Challenge ~ {Day #7}

Thanksgiving Challenge ~ Day #7

Topic: Noelle
Title: Soft Tufts of Hair

{If you are new to this challenge~which is not your typical Thanksgiving challenge, you can catch up on the details here, and please feel free to join along at any time...}

This first week of the Thanksgiving challenge has been an encouragement to my heart, especially in the midst of a divided and hurting world around us.  So much has happened on a large scale this week as our country became the focus of the entire globe when tragedy struck through Hurricane Sandy and then again as our nation selected a leader for the next four years.   

~So Much Hair!~

We have been bombarded from all sides, through every avenue of social media; and although I am thankful to be informed, to have the ability to reach out and help in a small way, or to cast my vote and take a stand {regardless of the outcome}, I am especially grateful at times to escape from the chaos into my little corner of this world, my home, with the peace of Christ satisfying my heart and a sweet little bundle of grace filling my arms.  She is such a constant, physical evidence of God's grace and goodness to me; and I am glad to have the persistent reminder, especially when all is not right in the world around me.  As we cuddled this morning during her first bottle of the day, the sun streamed through the window, highlighting her soft, downy hair; and I suddenly realized where she is sending all of these calories I have been cramming into her!  She is growing out her hair, thicker and faster than I have ever before seen!  My favorite are the little new strands that stick straight up, not being long enough to lay flat just yet, and seen only when the light bounces and catches them at just the right angle.  One moment we are certain it is dark in hue; and then the light changes, revealing what appears to be a pretty, strawberry blonde.  So the final color is yet to be determined, but we are enjoying this phase of downy soft tufts of hair appearing almost daily across her little head.  In the midst of so much turmoil and struggle, I was thankful to take pleasure in something so simple and soft as brand new hair on the head of a sweet, growing baby.

~Smiles for Mommy~

If you are local and would like to help a relief project for New Jersey this week, please check out this page and do what you can to assist this effort.  

***Do not forget there is just over a week left to submit your entry for the book project for Noelle's birthday.  You can read about the project and the deadline by clicking here .  We are enjoying the submissions we have already received but would love to hear from you, if you are willing to participate.  Thank you so much for helping us make Noelle's first birthday a special time of remembrance!!***

Giving Thanks Challenge ~ {Day #6}

Thanksgiving Challenge ~ Day #6

Topic: Noelle
Title: Lock Down

{If you are new to this challenge~which is not your typical Thanksgiving challenge, you can catch up on the details here, and please feel free to join along at any time...}

We just recently completed our first month of lock down {explained here}; and I must say that it was not what I thought it might be.  I pictured long days and dedicated play time.  I imagined lots of extra snuggles and reading books together.  Of course a spotless home, a plethora of baking and cooking, time to write, and so much more was on the list as well.  Some of these things have happened, but usually not the way I dreamed or planned.  Cooking dinner is a regular occurrence {and a mostly enjoyable one after months in the hospital and weeks of "quick" cooking in between doctor appointments}; sweet snuggles happen often, although I can never have enough of those; and we certainly have more play time than ever before.  But in the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy and seeing the tragedy that so many have experienced, I am reminded even more to be grateful for this lock down period.  Many in that situation would love to trade places with me, to be required to stay in their home, to have the ability to cook dinner once again for their family, to wash loads of laundry, to scrub the toilet, to do the "mundane."  It will happen again.  They will move on and rebuild and create a new normal, but their lives will never be the same, both for bad and good; and the road to that new normal will be long and hard.  So today, as I am confined to my home with my sweet miracle baby, I am grateful for this mandatory period in our lives and the "mundane" that I so often take for granted and sometimes, ashamedly, even complain. I am thankful for the help I have received in the form of my mom picking up groceries and running errands.  I am excited my husband has a good job and is able to be in class, finishing his degree and endeavoring to provide well for us.  I am glad to still be allowed to vote via an absentee ballot.  And I am especially enjoying my opportunity to hold a precious little girl and have an "excuse" to be with her all day long.  Life could not be sweeter.

If you are local and would like to help a relief project for New Jersey this week, please check out this page and do what you can to assist this effort. 

***Do not forget there are less than two weeks left to submit your entry for the book project for Noelle's birthday.  You can read about the project and the deadline by clicking here .  We are enjoying the submissions we have already received but would love to hear from you, if you are willing to participate.  Thank you so much for helping us make Noelle's first birthday a special time of remembrance!!***

Giving Thanks Challenge ~ {Day #5}

Thanksgiving Challenge ~ Day #5

Topic: Noelle
Title: Growth

{If you are new to this challenge~which is not your typical Thanksgiving challenge, you can catch up on the details here, and please feel free to join along at any time...}

  

For this challenge, I have encouraged many of you to choose something that is currently a trial in your life and focus on aspects of it for which to be thankful; and because I myself have some of those challenges in Noelle's situation, I will be weaving in some of these items during this thirty day challenge.  

 

To be completely honest, I still have days where I struggle with Noelle's overall lack of growth.  For a mom of a micro-preemie baby, it can be stressful to adhere to a strict feeding schedule, attempting to cram as many calories possible into my baby during the day, and yet still yielding such small results for my efforts.   It has gotten easier.  Each pound that we have reached has lessened the stress level, but I think I often feel personally responsible for her growth, or lack thereof.  Of course the severe reflux has not helped issues along the way since we have had to experiment with her intake and medication levels in order to try and keep food down; and she is also burning a lot of calories during her waking moments since she never.stops.moving!  A hand is always waving or a foot is constantly kicking, and these are things we would never want discourage, especially developmentally.  Until last week, I thought we had finally crossed a hurdle.  Noelle had finally averaged a pound per month by her ten month birthday and had experienced her best two month growth period ever.  We made it past the sleep study and seemed to have the reflux mostly under control, and I really thought we would finally cruise a little faster, or at least maintain a more consistent growth rate.  But all of that changed at her appointment last Monday when we discovered she had gained only five ounces in three weeks, weighing 10 lbs./4oz.  Making it even harder, I know of so many other micro-preemie babies who, once they reached "term" and arrived home, started growing like weeds; and now you would never guess that they spent months in the NICU when they were first born.  So there have been discouraging moments and days, endless efforts, additional feedings, various sleeping positions, and even tears; but in the end, I have to remember that Noelle's growth is not my responsibility.  It is God's.  Of course this does not negate my responsibility as a mother to feed and care for my little girl; but ultimately, God is growing Noelle, not me.  He has determined her size and weight and her "normal," and I must relax and remember that her growth and progress will not happen by the chart.  So instead, I choose to focus on God's continued goodness, especially in her growth, and never forget the place in which we started.  Today, she weighs 10 lbs./8oz.; but in perspective, she weighs 168 ounces or 14 times her birth weight!!  Now that is something for which to be thankful!!

***Do not forget there are less than two weeks left to submit your entry for the book project for Noelle's birthday.  You can read about the project and the deadline by clicking here .  We are enjoying the submissions we have already received but would love to hear from you, if you are willing to participate.  Thank you so much for helping us make Noelle's first birthday a special time of remembrance!!***

Giving Thanks Challenge ~ {Day #4}

Thanksgiving Challenge ~ Day #4

Topic: Noelle
Title: Noelle & Her Daddy

{If you are new to this challenge, you can catch up on the details here, and please feel free to join along at any time...}

~Daddy's Girl~

While I am quite certain that my little daughter loves me {as much as is possible for a ten month old baby}, there is a certain person in this household whom she absolutely adores.  She is a "Daddy's Girl" through and through, and I would not have it any other way.  Their connection began before she was ever born, his voice generating most of her kicking movements throughout the pregnancy.  Watching their relationship continue to develop has been a joy for me; and even though he gets far less time with her during the week than I do, she never ceases to be amazed and awed by him.  It is how it should be with little girls and their daddies, and I hope she always has a special connection with him.  He is an incredible daddy, and I thank God for him and the father that he is to our little girl.  I could continue writing; but tonight, I think the pictures say it all...we are truly blessed.

~Daddy showing me how to find all the hidden secrets in my book!~

~Blurry, but the look of laughter is still captured~

***Do not forget there are less than two weeks left to submit your entry for the book project for Noelle's birthday.  You can read about the project and the deadline by clicking here .  We are enjoying the submissions we have already received but would love to hear from you, if you are willing to participate.  Thank you so much for helping us make Noelle's first birthday a special time of remembrance!!***

Giving Thanks Challenge ~ {Day #3}

Thanksgiving Challenge ~ Day #3
Topic: Noelle
Title: Spitting

{If you are new to this challenge, you can catch up on the details here, and please feel free to join along at any time...}

Yes, you read the title correctly.  I have actually shocked myself in being thankful for something I never thought possible as Noelle has added a new trick to her bag {you can see her others here and here}.  Of course, once we started videoing, she first acted as if she had no idea what we were referencing and just did one of her old tricks; but she finally cooperated and showed off what she now does all.the.time.  It is often non-stop from the moment she wakes up, and I hear her in the cradle doing that more often than any other kind of noise!  While I know we will soon need to train her not to spit {especially when it turns into spitting food!}, for now I am enjoying this as yet another sign of her development, while she explores new sounds and attempts to copy what we do with our own mouths.  She is doing so well, and I am constantly amazed at the changes I see with her, almost daily sometimes.  So as strange as it is, today I thank God for Noelle's spitting and wonder if perhaps it puts a smile on His face too.

***Do not forget there are less than two weeks left to submit your entry for the book project for Noelle's birthday.  You can read about the project and the deadline by clicking here .  We are enjoying the submissions we have already received but would love to hear from you, if you are willing to participate.  Thank you so much for helping us make Noelle's first birthday a special time of remembrance!!***

Giving Thanks Challenge ~ {Day #2}

Thanksgiving Challenge ~ Day #2
Topic: Noelle
Title: Tiny Fingers

{If you are new to this challenge, you can catch up on the details here...}

We love things that are miniature.  People everywhere never seem to tire of stopping to ooh and ah over things or people that are tiny.  I think that is part of the attraction with babies; they are miniature versions of us, and there is something unique and special about that, different than any other type of miniature dog or toy.  We are fascinated with babies' tiny ears and mouths, and we count all their toes; we marvel at their sweet little eyes and their itty bitty noses.  But it is their fingers which you often find us touching and holding more than anything else, I think because it is one of the first things they use to respond back to us.  That sweet "grab and hold" reflex warms our hearts; and you often find people reaching out to babies' hands, knowing that those little fingers will grab tightly onto theirs in an immediate response.  Noelle's fingers are extra special to me.  I think partly because after she was born, it was really the only part of her which we touched for many days; and she responded to us.  Her fingers were the tiniest I had ever seen in my life; her entire hand was barely the size of my pinky nail.  She could not grab onto our fingers the way most babies could, but it did not mean that she did not try!  It was through this touch, between our fingers, that we physically communicated that we were with her, encouraging her to fight hard with us by her side.  But there is another distinct reason why I thank God for these darling fingers.  I am not sure we ever publicly shared this detail since it was the least of our concerns at the time; but at our first high-risk ultrasound, one of the issues they believed they saw in Noelle's development was that her fingers appeared to be deviating to one side, at least on her left hand.  At the time, they were convinced it was yet another sign {of the many they had seen} that pointed them to the Triploidy diagnosis.  As we went through many other ultrasounds through the following weeks, they were never again able to get images of that hand; and so it was yet another thing we would have to wait and see, if she even survived the pregnancy.  Still, with all the other grave concerns she was facing, it was not the first thing I remembered after she was born.  In fact, I think it was later that night or the next day before I thought of it and asked Tom, "what about her fingers?" and received the reply {with a huge grin}, "they are absolutely perfect."  It is a small thing in comparison to all of the issues she has overcome, but these perfect, petite fingers {which are now giant sized compared to when she was born!} are a constant reminder of another evidence of God's grace in our lives; and today, I thank Him for them.

***Do not forget there are only a couple of weeks left to submit your entry for the book project for Noelle's birthday.  You can read about the project and the deadline by clicking here .  We are enjoying the submissions we have already received but would love to hear from you, if you are willing to participate.  Thank you so much for helping us make Noelle's first birthday a special time of remembrance!!***

Giving Thanks Challenge ~ {Day #1}

Today begins a 30 day challenge of giving thanks {if you missed yesterday's post, you can read it here for the explanation}, but not just your typical "think of something each day for which you are thankful."  I have done that before and think it is great; but this year I wanted to do something different~something that made me put more effort and thought into the season.   So I decided to choose one topic and find 30 different aspects of it for which to be thankful.  Several have said they will take up this challenge with me, and I am excited to see how some are already beginning to be encouraged and to pray for others as we embark upon this endeavor to purposefully give thanks each day of this month.  We still welcome anyone who would like to participate with us and encourage you to share each day as well through this month.  I pray this sets a pattern for my life that will continue far beyond the 30 days of November and this Thanksgiving month, and I hope it does the same for you.

I had originally planned a different type of post for today, but that changed when I saw and read some stories regarding NICU evacuations during Hurricane Sandy and was reminded of something else in Noelle's situation for which I am thankful.  So the original post will just have to wait for another day as this is now on my heart.  Updates on Noelle will continue to be provided throughout the month as well and will be woven into the daily posts when we have new information to share.  So, for what aspect of your topic are you thankful?

Thanksgiving Challenge ~ Day #1
Topic: Noelle
Title: Forsyth Medical Center NICU

~Today, I am thankful for the incredible NICU in which Noelle lived for so many months and the protection that God provided while she was there.  As I watched the news today and read reports on the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy,  I saw and read stories of various preemie babies who had to be transferred through the chaos of the storm in the middle of the night, due to a loss of power.  The pictures and emotions of parents that were described brought back a flood of memories and my own emotions.  We went through one somewhat traumatic transfer (here), but we were with Noelle almost the entire time and never had to worry about power, flooding, carrying our less than 2 pound baby down flights of stairs, bagging her to help her breathe because of loss of power, and the list just continues.  I can only imagine the stress and anxiety these families experienced in this situation, on top of their already difficult NICU experiences; and it made me incredibly thankful, once again, for our NICU family at FMC.  I know there are many misconceptions that NICU nurses, respiratory therapists, nurse practitioners, and neonatologists simply rock and feed babies all day long, but nothing could be further from the truth.  On the contrary, I believe that the NICU team has one of the most difficult jobs within the medical field.  I know there are other challenging fields, but my point is that while the job is sometimes very rewarding, the path to that reward is often an incredibly long and difficult struggle as these precious people fight to do everything possible to save babies' lives.  Their patients never speak to them to tell them how they are feeling or where it hurts; they must instead closely follow the clinical signs for how to treat them.  They use monitors and lab results, ultrasounds and x-rays; but when it comes down to "the rubber meeting the road," they rely on their knowledge, experience, and instinct to respond to so many situations that happen and then change from one minute to the next.  So when the power goes out, and they are left without technology, they rise to yet another challenge and continue to do their job in providing the very best care for the tiniest and sickest babies that are born into this world.  Respiratory failure, organ failure, heart failure, brain bleeds, bowel perforation, and infection are only a few of the items that they handle on regular basis; and yet they return to each shift with a passion and a love that is unrivaled.  I think that is what amazes me the most~the care and concern and the communication with the parents through the process.  A lot of bad news is delivered to various parents on a daily basis in the NICU; and yet they handle it with honesty and deep compassion.  If I wrote a book on this, I could still never do these incredible people the justice they deserve.  I wish I could adequately explain even one hour in the NICU and give you a true glimpse of what they actually do, but I hope you understand that it is far more than rocking and feeding babies.  I know not every NICU is as incredible as the one with which we were blessed, and I am forever grateful to our FMC NICU family for your faithful service, your incredibly hard work, your tireless efforts, your sweet optimism, your endless hours of answering questions and explaining issues, your gentle honesty, and your undying love for Noelle and our family.  I cannot think of you or speak of you in this way without tears in my eyes and a heart overflowing with gratitude for the impact you have made in our lives.  You will forever be a part of our family.

***Do not forget there are only a couple of weeks left to submit your entry for the book project for Noelle's birthday.  You can read about the project and the deadline by clicking here .  We are enjoying the submissions we have already received but would love to hear from you, if you are willing to participate.  Thank you so much for helping us make Noelle's first birthday a special time of remembrance!!***

A Thanksgiving Challenge

~Daddy got me a pumpkin just my size!!~

I love fall.  The smell of crisp air, the sight of beautifully colored bushes and trees, the sound of crunching leaves beneath my feet, the feeling of cozy sweaters, and the taste of freshly baked pumpkin bread are many of the nostalgic items that awaken all the senses and signify fall to me.  But it is also so much more than that; and while we should have an attitude of thankfulness all year round {especially as believers}, it seems that this is the time of year when the entire world around us endeavors~in some way~to demonstrate a thankful spirit, even if only for a short time.  Thanksgiving is the time of year in which my family comes together from across the states, so it makes it even easier to celebrate that spirit as I am surrounded by the ones who know me best and still love me the most.  But this season is different.  The impact of this past year has made the attitude of a thankful heart sink deeply into my soul; and more than ever, my eyes have been opened to the incredible blessings which Christ has lavished upon me.  Still, being thankful is an action which requires thought and effort; it does not happen to us passively.  Thus, I am issuing a challenge to myself and decided to include anyone else who is also willing to participate.  For the next 30 days, I will be doing my best to post something for which I am thankful, each and every day {if I happen to miss a day, as can happen with Noelle's schedule, then I will make it up on the next day}.  However, as I thought through this, I wanted it to be deeper and much more significant than 30 various things, so I have narrowed the focus.  It is much more challenging and thought-provoking to dwell on one subject and examine it from all facets to determine how it is affecting your life.  So the challenge is as follows:

1.  Choose a theme (this can be a person, place, thing, etc...).  For example, you might choose your job or your family (or get even more specific and choose only one member of your family).  Be thoughtful and creative as you will be dwelling on this and thanking God for it each day.

***On this note, if you are currently struggling through a circumstance or an issue, then I would encourage you to make that your theme for the month.  Nothing changes your perspective or your attitude quite like finding aspects of your trial for which to be thankful.***

2.  Each day in November, think through some of aspect of this theme for which you are thankful, and write it out.

3.  Post it.  Post it on your fridge or your facebook wall or wherever you will see it consistently.  If you have a blog, then write a blog post each day and share it with others.

4.  Share it with us.  Whether you choose to leave a comment each day on this blog or you post a comment on the Grace Outpoured Facebook Page, others are encouraged when they read through your experiences of learning to be thankful, so if you are willing to share it with us as well, then we would love to hear from you!

In keeping with the current subject of this blog and the theme of our lives for the past year, my topic will be Noelle; and I look forward to what God reveals in my heart through this next month as He continues to teach me to give thanks in everything.

Will you take up the challenge?  If so, what is your theme?